amazingness

http://jenhatmaker.com/blog/2012/07/27/in-the-basement#.UBMaba6lnaR.facebook


this is an amazing post i suggest you all read

First time caver!!!

Talk about a crazy weekend… I gotta tell you about the craziness of my first caving experience… 

So Phil took me to KOR this last weekend (Karst-O-Rama) down in Kentucky. On Thursday night we got there and got the tent set up and hung out with some people before the rain started. Friday morning we get up and head out for Millers Cave. Phil’s cousin was leading a group there so Phil was tailing the group so of course I stayed second to the end so that he was always there to keep an eye on me. Let me set up this view for you… I have coveralls on over my layer of under armor, knee pads to protect me, and a bright yellow helmet with a light on it which makes me look just like a coal miner hahah… so anyway we get there and hike up the side of a mountain to get to the cave entrance. So by this point I am petrified beyond belief and my heart beat is a million beats a minute but I think I did an ok job not looking crazy scared hahaha. So we get in and the first thing we have to do is army crawl… forever… ok not forever but it’s a long way and Im thinking “oh god what if we get to a point where I don’t fit” well anyway I did and sure enough eventually I make it out to the other side and am officially in the cave now. The cave was kinda cool but I was so busy paying attention to where I was going and not falling or not dying that I didn’t spend much time looking around. I worked my butt off trying to keep up. I thought I got stuck once but Phil calmed me down and told me how to make my shoulders fit better. This calmed me down a lot… Then there was this crazy hole where phil just spider manned his way up but they had to pull all of the rest of us up since we couldn’t pull the same act he had just done… By the time all was said and done 4 + hours later I was exhausted and convinced that I wasn’t a fan and wasn’t sure if I wanted to try it again on Saturday….
Saturday morning came and I woke up petrified yet again of what the day would hold but I sucked it up and told myself to put on my big girl panties and deal with it… So we head out for day 2…. A new cave and let me tell you about this crazy drive… all the roads here are po-dunk little back stone country roads and then all of a sudden we pull off this currently crappy road on to what they call the “goat path road”  It is only as wide as a single vehicle… you have to have 4 wheel drive and it has brush growing down both sides and puddles the size of creeks across them…. It takes quite a while and a lot of good driving to eventually get to a place where we had to get out and walk the rest of the way because the road was washed out…. This is a real road that is actually on a map… you wouldn’t even believe it…. I’d have trouble getting a crappy 4 wheeler up this road…. Anyway we get out and head into the cave…. I was warned that it was a wet cave and I would be getting soaked…  so we get in and I decide to follow Phil’s cousin so that way I don’t have time to get freaked out haha… There was this crazy long passage that was super narrow  but we were going so fast I didn’t have time to worry about it… I was jumping over obstacles and propelling myself through some areas and crawling through water and squeezing through areas and for once I felt like the spiderman of this relationship hahah. I was really proud of myself…. Anyway we get through that and we take a minute to relax on this big hill in this big cavern and we all layed down and shut off our lights…. Its crazy how dark it was… you don’t realize what dark is until you have done something like that… you keep looking for light or looking for some speck of light or you start seeing what you think is something when there really is nothing but pitch black…. It’s the coolest thing ever… I just couldn’t get over it and your eyes don’t adjust eventually like they do in a dark bedroom or closet… you are just in blackness… it was sooo amazing… so anyway we eventually get up and moving again and we are wading through water waist high in places and im climbing up stuff and exploring and was even leading for awhile…. I found ways to climb up without assistance… I was climbing on ledges and up through holes and under rocks… I tested my body in ways I didn’t know was possible… It’s funny what the body is capable of when you make it do stuff you don’t think you can do… at one point I was climbing up these rocks to get into a secret formation room and I fold a hand hold, pulled my leg up past my known flexibility and pulled myself up with my arms until I was up then proceeded to do it again from a smaller ledge with a smaller foothold and I managed to get up there yet again…. Then again and again I kept surprising myself… I even found a way to climb down something by pushing my back up against one wall and walking down with my legs pressed up against an adjoining wall…. I didn’t know I could that….   And since I wasn’t freaking out this time I actually stopped to look around and let me tell you…. It was beautiful… the formations in the caves and the waterfalls and the shapes and colors of the rocks…. You wouldn’t believe how gorgeous it is when its normally in complete darkness…. The stalagmites and stalactites were just gorgeous and I was fascinated and drawn into it all…. I was officially hooked I think at that point right before we decided to turn around and head back out…..  By the time we saw sunlight again I was exhausted but it was sooooo worth it!!!

Saturday night we hung out, had dinner, and phil took me up the main cave there. Its just a tourist cave that you can through in shorts and sandals but it is still a gorgeous and very large cave… there is this thing they call signature alley and it is this tight passage where past workers and cavers have signed their names into the wall… you aren’t allowed to anymore because its considered a historical place but if you try real hard you can find this picture of a well drawn bird which is the signature of someone famous…. I’ll leave you in suspense as to who drew it but its amazing…. Phil even ended up buying me my own new red helmet and bright helmet light and I bought a red cave suit to go with it…. I do believe I’m officially a caver (don’t tell my mother haha) and I guess that makes us a caving couple hahah….  How many people can say that hahah….

So anyway a rough start led to an amazing weekend and a new fun hobby. Oh and I found out later that that first cave is considered one of the hardest “intermediate” caves that there are and a lot of people were amazed that that was my first ever cave…. Maybe ill have to go back and tackle again so I can say I defeated it unafraid…..

I still have a lot to learn but Phil is a good teacher and my next big thing will be carrying my own backpack hahaha

Random off subject side note: while I was gone my friend Teresia got engaged to her boyfriend Christopher!!! I AM SOOOOOO EXCITED FOR HER!!!! Congrats again T!!!  Love you tons!!!!

July

So now it is well into July! Birthday Month!!! Hahaha I love birthdays… not just mine but everyones hahaha. Im a nerd but I know my sister Jenni is just like that too so I’m not the only one. So lets get caught up shall we?

Last weekend Phil and I headed to Cumberland for the weekend to hang with his family on the lake. We took our sweet time getting there stopping for random shopping trips and just took our time but eventually we got there and hung out around the campfire that night. Saturday we went out on the boat all day and I got fried hahah Im already peeling from it. Come to find out Phil is quite the water skiing champ and I got to witness it first hand. He said he will teach me too which should be interesting hahah. Saturday night his family surprised me by celebrating my birthday!!! Mom and Dad got me an awesome 6qt crockpot and an amazing set of new measuring spoons for me. My sweetie got me the 50 shades of grey book and his sister got me the other two parts to that series. We even had a yummy dessert which they put candles on. I was so surprised but super excited!!! Sunday morning we went fishing and caught 4 fish!!! Pretty good for a beginner like me I thought!!!!! Phil was a great teacher!!!

Had a flat tire this week that was a pain to deal with but oh well… Take everything in stride I guess!

Last night Phil got off work early since he went in early so we decided to go try out Frisbee golf… It was actually pretty fun since we teamed up rather than competing but I had a great time and it gave us a chance to get outside and explore some… It was a great date night.

Heading home this weekend!!! My niece got married in Ireland a week or so ago and her reception is Saturday night so I will get to see the whole family which Im excited about. Phil should have met almost everyone by now but in case we missed anyone they should be at the reception.

Summer is going way to fast…. I need it to go ahead and start over hahaha

Next Thursday we leave for my first caving experience!!! Guess who is excited…. This girl!!!! Phil took me to get my ‘caving suit’ and he bought me gloves and there are only a few more things we need to figure out. We leave Thursday and cave Friday and Saturday then we come home Sunday morning and Phil and I have another concert Sunday night…. Talk about a busy couple of weeks hahaha

Live it up I guess… we are only young once!!!

Peace and love

past to future

I had a funny idea cross my mind this morning and I thought Id share it with you all. So as Im walking to my car this morning I realized how life changes without you realizing it. So every morning I get up and go for a run as Phil goes to work. We leave the apartment together and kiss goodbye and I head to the gym and he heads to work. As I threw my bag in the car to go to work today I realized that I used to throw my bag into the car to go to school.  I remember how incredibly excited I was to finally have a drivers license. I remember going to pick up my friend Teresia to go for the inaugural drive. She had taken me for one on county rd G when she got hers so I picked her up for mine.  It was incredible. Then school started and I drove to school every day often going faster than I should most of the time. I’d park in my designated spot and walk into the school feeling like I owned the place because now I could drive hahah. Now I don’t even think twice about getting up in my own apartment, cooking my own breakfast with food I bought at the grocery store or farmers market, brushing my teeth in my bathroom or heading to work in my car… What a grown up thing to say right? I went to work today…. I mean Ive been working since I was little. I babysat until I was 16 then I immediately started waiting tables which I did until a year ago just to support myself. Some summers I had multiple jobs working at the hospital and the diner or working at the bees and running the school phone system, odd and end jobs here and there just to put myself through school and pay my bills but now something feels different. I wake up to the man of my dreams. I put myself together and run in the morning. Head off to work and come home around five. I cook dinner and eat with Phil before settling down for the night. Sometimes going out to play with him or sometimes hanging out in the reading chair working on my latest novel. Whatever it is it just feels different now. Phil and I talk about houses and rent and mortgages and car payments and gas prices and politics and stuff I used to think was all grown up nonsense. Ive always paid my own car payments and insurance and stuff like that but yet it feels different now… Isnt that the strangest thing?

We went to a wedding this past weekend with his cousin getting married. I caught the bouquet and I couldn’t help but think… She gets to throw this thing to me and she never has to think about catching one ever again… She will wake up tomorrow morning married…. I wonder if she feels different at all or if the happiness just continues forever…. Its just something kind of fun to think about I guess….

Everything I do on a daily basis now…. Will I look back at it ten years from now and have the same conversation with myself that I had this morning… Will I have kids and a home and a husband and will I walk to the car in the morning carrying a sleeping child to take to daycare and look at my car and laugh and say… wow I remember when it was just me coming to the car in the morning and driving to work after waking up at that tiny little apartment in oxford.  Hahahah who knows…. Maybe one day this will all seem like a distant memory just like getting my drivers license seems like it was a lifetime ago…..

Check back in ten years and Ill let you know hahaha

God Bless

Its been awhile, sorry

Hey all... I hope this post finds you well and happy and healthy and loving life!

Sorry it has been since the 5th when I last updated... You know how life goes.... It just is hard to keep up with sometimes... so lets see.... 
Nothing much happened with the end of that week. Phil's uncle had a birthday party that Friday so we got to see a lot of the family on his dad's side that night which was nice!
then on Saturday we went to a Detroit Tigers game in Cincinnati and of course Detroit won!!! it was funny because we were cheering for different teams and even the lady next to us got a kick out of watching us never cheering at the same times hahahah But my boys didnt let me down and we won!!! Verlander must have known I was coming because he shaved hahaha Phil was a good sport considering I oohed and aahhed over Justin Verlander for the entire game ahahha

How cool is this I got the ball in midair

I was pretty excited about this photo not gonna lie hahaha
We went to this church festival after the game and I got to see fireworks which of course made me happy and Phil won be two adorable bears at the carnival games hahah. Love him....

 That night was another concert night in our summer series so we headed to riverbend to see Jarrod Niemann, Chris young and Miranda Lambert

Jarrod is the bottom picture and I didn't have any awesome ones of Miranda to post but I have plenty pics of the concert on my facebook so feel free to check it out there! Some are very blurry... I really need a new camera and a few lessons on photography but hey I don't try to impress I just wanted the memories for one day when im too old to remember that Phil and I went to a million concerts in one summer hahahah maybe my lack of talent will improve with age and one of these days ill be awesome at photography hahahah (not holding my breath)

So anyway Concert was amazing and then on Saturday morning my mom and dad came to visit me!!! I was incredibly excited to have them here since they haven't seen the apartment all decorated and finished!!! It was so fun to show them the place and to have them stay with me. Phil got kicked out for a couple days but I figured he could stay with parents since it was fathers day weekend anyway hahaha. Saturday night we went to a party for Phil and his house and my parents met his ENTIRE family (both sides) and everyone seemed to get along great which is definitely a blessing!!! Will make the future much easier for us both hahah
Sunday morning I made a huge breakfast for us and we went to church. Dad was excited to see where I go to church here and I think he really liked it and the priest which was cool. I think he feels better about me living here now hahah Then sunday night I made a huge Fathers day feast with grilled malibu chicken, squash and zucchini, rice, and even an array of desserts for  him. Phil and his mom joined us and I thought dinner went well! Everyone said they liked it so maybe I am getting pretty good at this whole domestic housewife thing hahaha I love learning to cook though and I think i am getting much better at it now that I buy only fresh foods.
If it can go bad its good for you if it can't go bad in a week it isnt - awesome words to live by. So i dont eat any fast food and i avoid processed foods like its my job so now its a lot more fruits veggies and proteins.
Anyway I gotta get to work now
I will finish updating you more soon

peace and love

fire

Have you ever looked at a fire and gotten lost in it.. Im not a pyro don't worry thats not where this post is going but seriously... I went to the lake a couple weekends back and as I was staring at the fire I kind of became lost into it mesmerized almost by the ever changing flames.... Last night I had a dream where I was engulfed in flames but it didn't hurt and I wasn't in pain and it was almost like I controlled it.. Like I knew I owned the flames that engulfed me... I think my mind has become more abstract as I become older because I have no doubt that this dream was actually meant to inspire me not to scare me... I had a rough weekend thinking about Lecom's graduation and where I could have been today... I looked at pictures of my friends in their doctor caps and gowns and was almost envious... but then I remembered something important... This is what I chose... I chose to let that life go and I chose to move forward... After I decided to give up my original dream of becoming  a doctor I could have lost myself I could have went back to mom and dad's to work at applebees for the rest of my life... I could have given up.. it would have been easy... but thats not what life is... Life is too short to just give up... you have to adapt just like the flames in a fire adapt to the wind and the wood and even the people around it... I knew Erie wasn't for me.. I was never happy there... I loved my friends but I hated the town, the school, the way I was, who I was, I wasn't healthy, I wasn't working out.... I wasn't even trying anymore... its like my body was telling me something and I refused to listen... Making the decision to give up and move on was one of the hardest things in my life but I did... I sucked it up accepted my mistakes and my bad decisions and applied to graduate school.... I always had a pull toward Miami and I never knew why... My sister and I were texting on Saturday and she is amazing, as always, and her comment to me was something like this "you had to move on, you had to give up its what led you here today... maybe you were meant for a PhD maybe you were just meant to find Phil but this was your purpose"...  This is amazingly true for me... I am happy here and more so that I have been living in any other town and I am happier with Phil than I have been with any other man and I am happy with my degree and my research and my job which is also all firsts for me..... I think my brain last night was reminding me "hey you adapted you changed you are fierce and strong and can withstand anything"  Who knows maybe it was just a dream composed of crazy things I saw throughout the day but Im going to be the optimist here and assume it was either God or my own strength inside me inspiring me to continue and reminding me that I wasn't meant to be in Erie this past weekend just like I wasn't meant to continue on that path. I have finally found who I am and who I am supposed to be and I love the look at the direction it is heading... I will continue to adapt and change and as I realize that with each passing year I am continuing to grow and change and thats ok... thats how it is meant to be... So get comfortable and enjoy my warmth cause this flame is no where near done!!!!

all kinds of happy

So a lot has been going on sorry for the lack of posts....
Maciek my collaborator from Chicago left last Saturday. We got so much accomplished and achieved so much data that I think we are turning it into two papers instead of one.. The idea of having my name on multiple publications astounds me. I am already starting to work on the manuscript for one of them and I can't believe this is all really happening. Talk about a happy girl!!
This week at work was pretty laid back because I have to go through one last long week of four hour samplings starting on monday. It will be especially long since I will be doing it by myself but I figure I can handle that just fine! Its only five days after all!
We got a new student for the summer and she seems pretty cool and it sounds like Im going to be working with her a lot. She is an undergrad from New York here on a research experience thing but she seems competent enough so it wont be too bad I dont think. The project she is helping me with should be pretty interesting too so Im not too worried

Went to Cumberland with Phil and his family last weekend. It was a great time and I got an awesome tan!! We went out on the boat all day Saturday and Sunday and I went tubing with Phil on Sunday.. HE IS CRAZY AWESOME... so while im holding on for dear life he is doing tricks and at one point decides to jump OVER me three times in a row.. it was crazy and his mom got it on video so hopefully I can show you guys at some point! My weird irrational fear of deep water wasnt bad either. We floated around together and fell off the tubes together and I didn't freak out which was good.. I just feel safer with Phil around I think.... Life is overall just better when he is around

Last night we went to a concert down in Riverbend and it was amazing. Thompson Square, Darius Rucker, and the AMAZING LADY ANTEBELLUM!!! right after Darius finished they postponed the show due to weather and Phil and I got drenched but we stuck around and by 10pm Lady A was back on stage singing. It was kind of fun to hang out dancing and holding each other and kissing each other in the rain. It amazes me what a great group they are. they sound just like they do on the radio when they are in real life which is impressive I think. Few groups are that good! I was very impressed and it was well worth the rain

Finished reading "the hunger games" in about 2-3 sittings. I barely started it one day then got well over half way the next day and finished it yesterday. it was good i have to admit and I am looking forward to buying the second and third ones to finish this weekend... Its nice reading for fun again...

K back to work now. Hope all is well with everyone
God Bless